Sometimes the day gets really long. . .considerably longer than the days before it. My daughter was up at 11:00 p.m., 2:00 a.m., and 4:00 a.m., and by the time work started at 8:00 a.m., I was whatever that stage is beyond exhausted, if such exists. When I got home from work, my husband and I had picked her up from daycare and then our nightly routine began. I worked on dinner, he fed our daughter, and usually while he helps clean the kitchen, I get my time with her when I get her ready for and put to bed.
Tonight was different. She was so exhausted from school that she was irritable, hungry, tired and extremely impatient. Before I finished making dinner, my husband had already fed her, cleaned her up and got her to bed. I knew this was the only necessary option, but I ached over the fact that I had not seen her all day and my time was then cut even shorter. She typically wakes up for a final feeding around 10:00 p.m. and I knew that would be my window for the day.
At 9:30 p.m., I went to get a shower as I knew I would have 30 minutes before my much anticipated time with my little girl. To my disappointment, she woke up while I was in the shower and my husband took care of her final feeding for the night. I could hear her waking up in the other room and knew my window was gone. I know this sounds like a small defeat. After all, it was only one night, right? After she was born and I returned to work, I still sometimes get sensitive to those short windows I have with her each night. This ultimately was beginning to destroy my night. I was upset, negative, and nearly in tears before I felt a sense of calm sweep over me and God may as well have started calling me ungrateful.
I started thinking about the men and women out there raising children with no help. I thought about the children who don’t know a parent’s love and they identify the word “parent” with “abandonment.” I thought about how many children go to sleep hungry at night. I was being narrow-minded and short-sighted and undeniably selfish. John 1:16 says, “From the fullness of God’s grace we have all received one blessing after another.” I have a child who plays all day with other children and it wears her out to the point of exhaustion at night. She’s healthy and happy and full when she goes to bed. She knows she is loved. I know what it’s like to feel loved and I know my family does too. What part of this story constitutes crying? This was a good night. I missed my daughter, but I appreciated the circumstances as they developed in the nature that they did. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says, “Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” My night was salvaged by a quick shift in perspective. So next time you think things are on a swift decline, attempt a gracious viewpoint and see what it changes.
Blue Withens 